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Archive for the ‘God’ Category


Monday, March 29th, 2010

Hello Dear Fellow Spiritual Sojourners…hope your trip is going well.

Long time no blog…

Ran into circumstances that forced me to practice what I preach (ugh!)

I am reminded that spiritual values are actually felt… thought you might appreciate this reminder.

“The universe is fondling you in ways you can’t possibly imagine.”

We don’t often think of the Universe fondling us exactly…often as not. the “fondling” can feel like rusty Brillo pads rubbing up against our psyche…that is, if we feel anything at all. But most all of us do long to feel good…and in a higher conscious moment to actually feel “the goodness” itself.

Be that as it may, if you stop for a moment, you can actually feel the fondling going on. And if you need some help, here’s a poem I wrote over thirty years ago. I was driving on Highway 70 from Denver to Steamboat Springs when I was struck by…well…I think the poem says it…


by Errol Strider

I want to be touched.

I want the barren, cold hardness

of fear‑chromed sensations

to be transformed

Into willingness,



And velvet, soft burlap nudging me.

I want signs with their opaque hard letters,

stranded in two dimensions

to become infused with Softness,

with pliable space.

The Present

to be filled

with cubed transcendence.

I want the shrubs left alone,

the trees to sprout and fly

sometimes in winter

And I want the snow to kiss me more often than it does.

I want the suckling.

I want to suckle the real universe,

to find the nipple of god,

place my lips on it,

caress and hail Him/Her/It…

To no longer be deceived by irrelevance,


or theft….

My own,

Stealing me from the Now

Stealing myself into Time

and its singular vision

and linear dryness

Away from my corrugated self.


I want to get off this bridge of polarity,

To arrive in Wonder

beyond this dotted reality

like halftones in a newspaper

This patched perception I call “my world”

trying so hard to misguide me

unkempt and concretized

defined by barbed wire thoughts

unwilling to unlock its waiting arms

or embrace my pre‑pubescent self

with seminal fluids.

Instead, I’m swallowed by some old dry sterile wind

bouncing off lifeless textures on the road

plaintfully asking me for a lift

or at least a quick feel.

I long to stand naked in a real breeze

with virgin oxygen to unmask myself

and reveal my ignorance gyrating

hoping it will breed….




and Saturation with all natural ingredients.

So, I lie in this fallow field

with my seeds in my pocket

waiting to plant myself

waiting to be unearthed

waiting for harvest

to reveal the sprouted essence

of my unquenchable Desire


© 1980 Errol Strider

Errol Strider, Artistic Director
The Laughing Heart
(415) 459-4512


Saturday, February 20th, 2010


The Nature of the Human Stock Exchange
(continuation of last Blog…
“What’s Real and How Would you Know?)

So, what’s an Infinity to do? Where is it going to spill if it wants to diversify, if it is already filling up everything…always? Why, the finite, of course. “What’s that?” asks infinity of itself. “Well…that’s what would happens if I separate the In from the Finite”…There you have it. Could that be what happened 13.4 billions years ago? The “In”…separated from the “Finite” knowing full well that that was impossible…hence the illusion, but hey…an illusion might be a really fun thing…like putting an amazing puzzle back together…with the addition of something the Infinite could only dream about…Novelty…and indeed the infinite does probably and literally dream novelty it up…and that’s where you come in.

Everything grows out of the nature and the quality of The Exchange.

Everything that happens occurs through an exchange. All life is just a bunch of never ending exchanges. All we ever do is exchange…exchange this air for that air, this water for that water, this saliva with that saliva…this car, this spouse, this idea, this emotion…all of it. All that is going on are exchanges.

Governments come into being as do corporations and all institutions to manage or at least attempt to manage, if not control, the exchange. Money exchange, stock exchange, chemical exchange, subatomic exchange, exchanging the purple dress one for the green one. Not to mention exchanging this body for not-this-body, probably the most mysterious of all exchanges…exchanging this mortal perspective for an immortal one.

And then there is what appears to be the opposite of exchange, the withhold, staying attached to something…all attempts to solidify, bind, control and concretize reality…to stop the movement of…the exchange.

The challenge is to manage and facilitate the exchange in such a way that, as Jeshua (aka Jesus) says, we keep the system in dynamic balance. Optimal exchange leads to an enrichment of those involved in the exchange: new formations, innovation and ever increasing complexity that must be harmonized with ‘the rest’, which in turn leads to a more abundant and variegated stew of life, which constitutes existence in the known universe…so far.

Every time we bump up against something, where we feel resistance, that is the universe calling to us to unfold, open up, receive, engage and be transformed through intercourse. Every lover knows this. Every artist knows this…the artist exchanges with her subject and out of that exchange comes the work of art. Lovers exchange and there is not only the potential for ecstasy but also for a brand new being. How’s that for a fantastic two for one deal?
So it is with people, with us, with life itself. Consider that we are, in fact, the work of art (obviously) in process—and who knows what the completed piece will look like, or maybe it’s just never finished or maybe it’s “finished” in stages, in little bursts and fits, until we are called to evolve some more.
It looks like the Life is the canvas,
Absolute Will is the artist,

Our wills… the brushes…

Conscious beings…the paint becoming the picture,

and every time we exchange color with the canvas, we become more conscious…more Being.


After all, if there were not divisibility, how could there be an exchange? How could there be growth, change, diversification, manifest beauty. But if duality is essentially an illusion, what is going on in these “exchanges?” And how is it that we appear to be wrapped up in a package that is decidedly over here and not over there? This is me and not him, her and it? What’s with that? …especially if “existence is seamless” as it is purported to be?”

Self awareness is reality turned inward upon itself and differentiated– that love which continually flows out of the infinite exchange of love itself as the First Source Meets the Second Source in infinite discourse…love must inevitably spill inwardly/outwardly as differentiation…hence “duality.” The only place for the Oneness to go is to the “Many-nesses.”

“God is all love rolled up into One. We are all love unfolded into the Many”.

Every conscious, volitional self-contained, self-aware being has the potential to become as God…to become an all-inclusive, even infinitely personalized universe of its own…forever expanding, universally exchanging…especially as it is understood that life is love exchanged in the ocean of Spirit.

The stage of time and space is set…and you are invited to play your part… to keep filling up the gap between the “IN” and the “FINITE” with your “ever emerging selfhood.” And that’s achieved through making good exchanges…always willing to trade in what was… for what is eager to be…through and as you.
So, welcome to the “Human Stock Exchange”…where you can keep making exchanges…
the more fluid they are…the more ecstatic they become,
the deeper and more penetrating…the greater possibility for new Life… an ever new you…
the more that you give yourself to the exchange, the more love abounds.
Places Everyone!

Think on’t!

Errol Strider
(415) 459-4512


Thursday, December 10th, 2009
Once you start off on a spiritual journey, you will be assigned several companions. One of them is “Yeah, but…” Every time you attempt to step more fully into self-realization and spiritual intent, especially in the early stages, you can pretty well count on “Yeah, but…” to show up at your door.

As expected, “Yeah, but…” came by to see me today. I was attempting to hang out with another companion, “Why Worry? God’s got you covered.”

Now“Yeah, but…” always brings an entourage. You’ve heard of “Yes men.” Well, “Yeah, but…” brings along a lot of ““Yeah, but… men”–Lobbyists, witnesses and experts to prove its case and justify its position. (“You won’t have enough money.” “Nobody cares for you.” “People are undependable. “Get what you can while you can.” “You can’t trust men… or women.” “Life on this planet is doomed unless we get with the program and we’re too far gone in apathy and denial to do that.” “God is irrelevant to your daily life” “Life sucks!” etc.)

Now, “Yeah, but…” usually doesn’t tell me what action I actually need to take to address these annoying issues. That’s not its job. Its job is just to incite worry, assuming that if it stokes up enough anxiety and reinforces it with adequate justifications, proofs and corroborations happily supplied by its “Yeah, but… men,” I will forsake “Don’t worry, God’s got you covered.” and “Get real.” (One of “Yeah, but’s favorite injunctions.)

You see, from “Yeah, but’s…” point of view “Don’t worry, God’s got you covered.” is not only preposterous, but actually illegal… according to its laws. Anyone guilty of promoting this point of view deserves punishment and annihilation, even better, crucifixion, if they still allowed it. At the very least, mounted on the rack of ridicule.

When I tried to explain to “Yeah, but…” that the reason I need not worry is that I am realizing that I’m enfolded in the embrace of an all loving, all supportive Presence that has my best interests at heart.

“Oh, that,” “Yeah, but…” says disparagingly, insisting that IT has my best interests at heart, while attempting to persuade me that “Don’t worry, God’s got you covered.” is stupid, useless, irresponsible, fucked up, or any other adjective that can describe the utter insanity of allowing this perspective into my mind and why I need to do something about it…before…(and here it resorts to some projected time in the future that “Yeah, but…” predicts, with great conviction and the exhaustive research supplied by its expert witnesses)… calamity occurs…if I don’t change my ways, get busy worrying and take control.

Now part of why “Yeah, but…” is so convincing is that it can point to an almost infinite number of instances in which people who don’t respond to it’s highly trained and credible experts get their asses kicked and lose shit.

“Yeah, but…” can easily demonstrate through history that there is no “god” to cover my ass in troubling circumstances, let alone break my fall or pay my bills..

What “Yeah, but…” fails to mention, by cleverly hiding this reality, is that all this worry doesn’t actually prevent life from kicking my ass or taking away my shit.

Nevertheless, I implore “Why worry? God’s got you covered,” “what do you have to say to that.”

“Why worry, God’s got you covered,” humbly but authoritatively asks, “Do you do anything to beat your heart? Bring your self into existence? Breathe your lungs? Run your metabolism? Send messages throughout your nervous system? Continually feed and cleanse every cell in your body? Keep gravity operating? And does any amount of worry cause those things to happen?”

I turn to “Yeah, but…” who very deftly changes it’s first name to “Well” and starts,
“Well, but…”‘

“Oh, now you’re “Well, but…” are you? “Well…but”…does it?”


“So if none of this angst makes the most essential processes of your life happen without you even being conscious of them, let alone worrying about them, then do you think agonizing will help our host solve any of the problems that confront him?

But “Yeah, but…” makes one more attempt to validate its position by bringing in its tag team partner, “No, but…” who trots out its list of very compelling “or else’s.” (“You better get real about all of this or…”You’ll be homeless.” “You won’t have electricity.” “You’ll be rejected.” “You can’t pay your bills.” You’ll be downsized.” “You’ll be old, decrepit, alone, homeless and helpless, etc.)

“But doesn’t all that worry just sap your energy and keep you from creatively engaging your problems?” “Don’t worry. God’s got you covered” retorts.
“Yeah, but…”

“So, isn’t worry absolutely ridiculous and totally counterproductive…and that’s why you, “Yeah, but…” are nothing but a worry wart and all your “or else’s” are totally bogus?



(Think on’t…)

Errol Strider
(415) 459-4512


Thursday, December 3rd, 2009

“Hmm…what am I in the mood for today?” wonders God.

Let me guess. God is in the mood for love–to experience life in his/her universe through and as us?

Possibly, but, as it turns out, she can only do that consistent with her nature.

That’s where you come in.

But…what is her nature?…

Well, it depends on her mood.

God is very moody.

For instance, if God is what’s behind everything, animating existence, infinitized… clearly God can be moody if not out right… fractious…perfect stillness and the Big Bang…well…there’s a lot of mood swings going on.

Most any mood you could ever be in…not to mention, all that’s followed the Big Bang.

Talk about moody!

 So that brings it back to us. How does God experiences his/her universe as us and stay consistent with her nature? Or more to the point…what are you in the mood for?

When you’re in the mood for pancakes…or veal ptarmigan… great sex… a ride on the bay…or for a good movie, a day at the beach, a vacation, a good conversation… or chocolate even? Is that God wanting to take the wrapper off? Is that God in the mood for those things, too?

And when you’re in the mood for a little self-indulgence, do you invite God to indulge herself with you? As you?

And when you’re in the mood for a little self-indulgence, do you invite God to indulge herself with you? As you?

And what about mood swings? Will you allow God to swing along with you when your mood swings? Does God swing? Does God go both ways. In and out? Back and forth? Yin and yang? Is that fractious?

Or, is God up for a threesome? Is God, in fact, a happy threesome? Did God, invent the ultimate threesome? Self beholding self emerging new self out of all that beholding?

Could it be that when you’re “in the mood” for something, that that is the Prime Desire…desiring…actually triggering that mood.

Could it be that it’s God that is in the mood for Frank Sinatra…a game of ping pong, a night at the opera, sitting down with a good book, playing a cross word puzzle or pulling your hat over your eyes?

On the other hand, are you ever “in the mood” for inflicting pain, receiving pain? Is that really a mood swing or is it just a desperate attempt to compensate for mood opportunities missed when you felt abused, abandoned, unseen or defiled? Stuff that may have put you in a…bad mood?

Check it out: Here’s where God’s nature reveals itself. When you have the luxury of being able to ask, “What am I in the mood for?” Are you not relaxed, available, with the energy, resources and maybe even the opportunity to satisfy that mood?

Could that be God’s nature? Not only instigating the mood, but also providing that which will satisfy the mood? Clever God. The giver and the receiver. And isn’t that where we come in? Ever relaxed and ready to “swing”. To go both ways…from giver to receiver endlessly…Perched on the pinnacle of eternity, eager to jump off?

Does God really swing both ways…from stillness to colossal undertakings? Is that who you are? A colossal undertaking emerging out of stillness, responding not just to God’s mood for a little sensual treat in time and space, but to his whims, his larks…Does God often have a whim for a little unending creativity? My God, is God always in the mood for a lark?

And what about God’s whims…If his moods are unpredictable, what about his whims? They must be positively capricious. And when God goes on a lark, how much is that going to cost!?

Hey, does God always give vent to his whims? Were you created on a whim? Or a lark?

“Today, just for a lark…” says God, “I think I’ll evolve a new species, I’ll give birth to…you, and I’ll make you as moody as I am, just on a lark, mind you.”

So, if you’re following God’s nature, I suspect, you’re always in the mood for… a good mood… whether it’s the sight of a baby, the feel of your lover’s fingers gently stoking the inside of your wrist, the intensity of a roller coaster ride or the sound of waves lapping at your boat.

So, go ahead and whistle your mantra… “I’m in the mood for love.” And while you’re whistling, if you listen closely, you may hear God’s infinite overtones—his moods whistling right along with you in perfect harmony.

So, how ’bout it, God…are you in the mood?
“I’m always in the mood. But what about you?” asks the Deity.

“Well, I’m in the mood for a little snuggle, but wait, let me put on something more comfortable.”

“Good idea,” saith the Ubiquitous Lady.

So, you put on your relaxed self, ready for action, and ever abiding in the trust, that, no matter what it may feel like, you can be assured, God is always in a Good Mood. 

And if you listen closely, you can almost hear God singing, “I’m in the mood for Love.”




Thursday, November 19th, 2009

“When you make the person of God your significant other, every other person you meet becomes…… significant.” ES

I live in Buddhist Country…there are a lot of Buddhists around here in West Marin, S.F. Bay area. I’m not sure whether Buddhists believe in a personal God…a God that can be known as “Other”. I don’t think so. After all, how can there actually be an “other” in a non-dualistic universe…and yet…there is obviously personality distinction. I deal with others all the time…and if I forget or deny them their “other-ness,” they are quick to remind me just how not them I am.

Is God “Other? Is there just Being (and non-being)? How important is it to even make a distinction? And more importantly, how does one concept or the other affect our lives? (“Who’s on first?”)

I’m kind of a both/and kind of guy. I like it that at the sub-atomic level…sometimes energy appears as particle and in other circumstances, as a wave (and even more recently as string. What’s next? A chord?) I guess it depends on the problem we’re trying to solve. (see Heisenberg Uncertainty Principle)

I went to a conference in Boulder on science and spirituality a couple of years ago and heard one speaker say that recognizing each of us as “the sacred other stimulated compassion in him, while a Buddhist scientist found that believing we are all one evoked compassion in him. What I find helpful is to know that the universe is imminently personal…self-aware and volitional. To know that I am both housed and permeated by a Self-aware presence of living love is very comforting. And I need to be comforted…there’s a lot of being jostled and irritated by “the others” going on.

Yes , a comforting face is welcome.

Indeed, Jesus referred to the Spirit of Truth (evidently a new and improved spiritual energy that he was able to liberate into the stream of human consciousness by virtue of his life, death and resurrection)…as “The Comforter.”

Jesus in fact said, “You have seen me, you have seen the Father.” Now, while I can accept the notion that God is much much more than a personality, personality is still one of the faces that God presents to us…along with Infinity of Being, evolution, and even ‘non-being…oh… and the face on the cover of “Mad”.

And in the faces of people, if you look closely enough, you’ll see that while each face is decidedly different…there is another face in there that you recognize as…

your own. (“How did that get there?”)

I think I would not appreciate existence quite as much if there weren’t such diversity…so many faces on the countenance of the Infinite. You might even stumble into the paradox that, somehow the infinite gets bigger because of all the distinctive faces it makes. (You could even criticize the Infinite for mugging…it makes so many silly faces.)

When these “separate” faces behold each other, something in the unique-ness of each cross- fertilizes with that which is unique to the other and both experience “putting a new face on it.”

Each is suddenly expanded by the other and that is how the Infinite (already a face full) gets…bigger. Some (facial) “expression” passes from one to another that neither had in the first “face.”

And those moments give birth to “smiling faces.”

Think on’t.

Next blog, “Is God Two-faced?” Part II, So let’s face it!”

Looking at the faces of Jesus and the Buddha in your mirror.